A Life After Death

God cares about me. God loves me. God sees me. He sees my needs and He also sees my wants (and He doesn't always withhold our wants from us- Sometimes we act like He's out to get us and never wants to give us things we want- but that's not true).

Anyway, I wanted to share my purse story. I wrote the incident here but to recap- Last Sunday (not yesterday, but the Sunday before) I left my purse containing my Bible, journal, and a book, on the back of my car while I was pumping gas, and when I drove off it fell off on the side of Route 1 (but my wallet or cell phone were in my car- thankfully). Anyway, I came home that day and just prayed something along the lines of, "Lord, for some reason you don't want me to have those things right now. Maybe it's to make me rely on you and not the things you showed me in my journal or in that book or even the verses I underlined in my Bible- but to just rely on You. Anyway, I would really like those things back though, so I surrender my bag to you, but I'm asking you to protect it and get it back to me if it's Your will." I also asked Him to just use this for His glory. Anyway, it may seem random and small and a stupid thing to pray for, but it was important to me, and the Lord knew it.

So Thursday night, I'm getting stuff together for our Thursday Night Girl's study at the church and see a number pop up on my phone that I didn't know. I let it go to voicemail and continued collecting my things. Finally, I got a chance to listen to the voicemail- it was from someone from my church. She goes on the explain how this guy that she works with in Southampton had found my purse and was trying to contact me. He tried to message me on facebook but it wasn't working (I must have it blocked from people I don't know), and so he finally said to this woman, Stephanie, "This is a really weird question, but you know everyone at Calvary, do you know a Tiffany Doran?" And yes she did!!!

Anyway, she gets to tell me the whole story over the phone today, apparently, he goes to church over near my house and had to get gas after church- well of course he never goes to that gas station, but today he had to- and as he's merging onto Route 1, he sees a bag on the median with a Bible next to it!!!! He thinks, "it might be someone from my church!" He can't stop because someone is behind him, but has to drive up at least a mile before he can exit and than he COMES ALL THE WAY BACK TO GET MY PURSE!!! Crazy! Anyway, he sees that there is already a car stopped with their flashers on looking through my purse. For some reason, he still decides to try to get the purse and asked the person if they found that purse! The person goes on the say that there is no wallet in it. He then says, i think it might be someone from my church's, do you mind if I take it? Any they give it to him!!!!

So he gave them to Stephanie today at work and I should have it all back tonight!

Isn't that awesome?
The Lord knew I really wanted those things. He caused me to surrender them to Him. I didn't need them. I think that was part of it- realizing I didn't need them, but I wanted them. And admitting that to the Lord. And He cares about my wants and needs and knows if they are something I should have or not and when exactly to give them back to me if He wants me to have them.

Anyway, it was a good reminder today that He is truly a personal God who cares about and loves me. So thankful!!!!

So. I saw my first dead man this afternoon.
In the ventilator rehab hospital my grandfather has been in since January, he rooms with two other men. So far, out of his roomates that he has had in the last two months, three have died. Today, I saw one of them.

He was a large fat man. He was new to the rehab. Richard, the old neighbor, had been moved to a private room to make room for this fat man in our room. He needed an extra large bed to fit his body. He was not even weaning off the ventilator. He didn't look good to begin with.

And so, when we came in to visit my grandpop today, the curtain was surrounding the bed of "fat man." We didn't really think about it...we thougth they were working on him, changing the linens and stuff. They left the curtain around when the nurse left the room. My mom, who keeps comparing my pop pop to all the other patients in the hospital as how well he is doing, was going to sneak and check around the curtain while the nurse was out to see how his numbers were. My dad yelled at her. Curtain means privacy.

Good thing my mom didn't look because she would have been a little surprised at how "well" the fat man was doing. After the nurse informed us of "fat man's" death, I had to peak around the curtain...I mean, I never had seen a dead man. I didn't get a good look, but, I could tell he was dead. It was wierd and strange to think that life goes that fast. I mean, just yesterday, he was alive and thrashing. Today, today...today was the beginning of his eternity. Life is but a vapor.

And so, when they brought the stretcher we high-taled it out of there, but not before commenting that the stretcher and body bag that they had brought for the man would not suffice the massive size of "fat man." I guess they didn't find it as amusing as we did.

Now you all are going to think that my family is unempathetic, unfeeling, morbid freaks. Well, maybe you are right, but...sometimes laughter is just good for you. And sometimes it's not. But sometimes, you just can't get through things without laughing. Some things are just that hard, I guess.

My mom hates my aunts. With a fervor. My grandpop just looks so good. His numbers are just great. He is weaning so well. All she wants is more time. But I guess there is nothing we can do about it.

But pray. Pray for a miracle. His doctor doesn't believe in miracles. He says they only happen on tv. But we know he is wrong. My grandmom is a miracle. We could never imagine brining her home from the hospital and not having to give her sponge baths. Today, she just went and got herself a shower. I did not have to do one thing. Our neighbor who is a nurse never even expected her to walk with a walker again. She should see her now. She's almost to a cane. It's crazy.
She's our miracle.
Seeing her walk into church a month ago, people called a miracle after hearing about the months she had spent in the hospital after heart attacks, being resusitated, having to be held down in her hospital bed or she'd run away, a broken pelvis, and fighting pneomonia, just to name a few....she is our miracle.