My Love

12:18:00 PM

Today is a splendid day. It is snowing. I know- crazy! It's autumn! I mean, we usually don't get any snow until at least after Christmas. And yet. It is snowing. And the Phillies are going to win the World series (which i keep mistakingly calling the "home series" much to my families amusement- also, my brother tricked me into thinking there were 12 innings in the "home series" and I looked very stupid and was the butt of my familie's joke as I pridefully told my sister how I always knew there were 12 innings...well, they were waiting for me to be surprised when the game ended- with the phillie's obviously winning- after 9 innings...too bad it was delayed by the rain and they revealed thier little trick to me!)

Today I made cranberry and walnut muffins. mmm. Cranberries are my new friends- i love the spinach and cranberry salad that i found in my better homes and gardens magazine. My grandmom loves it too.  And mmm...I will never forget eating Cranberry sauce with Erin and Amee and Hannah in England toward the end of the semester. What lovely times. 

But my post today is about my Love. 

 By night on my bed I sought Him whom my soul loveth: i sought him, but I found him not.
I will rise now and go about the city in the streets, and in the broad ways I will seek him whom my soul loveth: I sought Him, but I found Him not.
The watchmen that go about the city found me: to whom I said "Saw ye Him whom my soul loveth?"
It was but a little that I passed from them, but I found Him whom my soul loveth: I held Him and I would not let Him go...
Songs of Solomon 3:1-4

I've loved these verses the past couple weeks.
Because the Lord brought me back to my first love. I've strived this year. Strived and strived in my own sin and filthiness and disobedience. In my own works and failurs. And yet. The Lord loved me. He redeemed me, though I was redeemed once and for all years ago, I feel as if He redeemed me again. And renewed my love. He reminded me of who I am without Him- dust. filthy rags. everything perverted and disgusting.
And yet.
and yet.
He loves me.
He loves me!
Hallelujah. I am so glad. That He loves me.
And so I cannot but love Him.
And I do.
And I cannot but serve Him and draw near to Him- there is nothing else in this life that I would rather do.
Though I am so often blind. And my heart goes a whoring. And I am such an unfaithful bride.
He is so faithful to me.

And I went to visit upon her the days of Baalim, wherein she burneth incense to them, and she decked herself in earrings and jewels, and she went after other lovers, and forgat me, saith the Lord.
Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak comfortably unto her.
And I will give her her vineyards from thence, and the valley of Achor for a door of hope: and she shall sing there, as in the days of her youth, and as i the day when she came up out of the land of Egypt.
And it shall be at that day, saith the Lord, that thou shalt call me Ishi (my husband); and shalt call me no more Baali (my master)?
For I will take away the names of Baalim out of her mouth, and they shall no more be remembered by thier name.
Hosea 2:13-17

ANd I will betroth thee unto me for ever; yea, I will betroth thee unto me in righteousness, and in judgement, and in lovingkindness, and in mercies. I will betroth thee unto me in faithfulness: and thou shalt know the Lord. Hosea 2:19-20

Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed, neither be thou confounded, for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of they widowhood anymore.
For Thy maker is thy Husband; the Lord of hosts is HIs name; and the Redeemer, the Holy one of Israel; the God of the whole earth shall he be called.
For the Lord shall call thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith the Lord. Isaiah 54:4-6

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